Yes, it has been a nice day indeed. Today was the last day of summer quarter, so my students turned in their research papers, finished their remaining presentations, and said goodbye. The end of a quarter, especially a good one, is always a bittersweet experience. Some students simply wave and leave, while others come up for handshakes, hugs, or sometimes even give gifts. (No gifts this quarter .... oh well. lol ) I did get a nice note from a student I'd had some difficulty with earlier in the class. He is probably 19 or 20 - a little arrogant, and a tough customer - but a very good writer. Too bad he's an admittedly "lazy bum"; he could have had an easy A with just a little more effort on his part.
We had a confrontation about 2/3's way into the course over a test (really a "quiz") that I had the students grade together in class. Anyway, what's significant is that his complaining email to me was very bold and forceful (impertinent, if you ask me.... .) I'm not comfortable with confrontation so I thought long and hard about how to respond to him. Whatever I said back would need to address his complaints without sounding defensive or apologetic. I also wanted to point out to him in some subtle way that if he'd been doing the homework and coming to class regularly, he would not have been experiencing some of his frustrations. I wanted to say it in a way that was respectful but frank - even sound pleasant. I wanted to re-assert my status as "the instructor" with him, too. (He's one of those wise guys who sits in the back and smirks a lot.) So I stewed, fretted, and wrote the best response I could.
To my surprise and relief, he started showing up in class more regularly after that. He even participated more in class discussions. In his project evaluation letter, he commented that he'd also learned a lot about himself this quarter, and thanked me for the class. He left with a gentle smile, not a smirk.
So why am I mentioning this here? I suppose it's because this is another reflection of the change in my attitude about who I am. I want to be who I am on the inside - the one who refuses to be intimidated, judged, or diminished by anyone. That person doesn't require a protective layer of fat, nor does she feel the need to apologize that she's not thin yet. She'll get there soon enough. And I will. It feels great to feel good!!
After school I met with a good friend for lunch (easy on carbs, left something on the plate.... ). She commented that I look 20 pounds lighter. (Cool!) Then I came home, did my hypnosis again, and took care of some things. I did not do my pilates workout today because I am sore from yesterday's exertions afterall. My ankle injury from last month is smarting a bit too. But that's ok. My boyfriend is coming back tomorrow and we're hitting the G-Ball routine again. Plus, tomorrow morning I go back to the hypnosis center for my monthly personalized session. A hypnotist works with me individually for an hour, and then does a 1/2 hypno- process with me. I get to keep the recording to listen to over and over. Again, I don't know exactly how much I can lose before September 11, but regardless, I know I'm on the right path now. Everything feels better, from my job to my jeans. Cheers, all.
P.S. - My boyfriend is also blogging about all this at "www.mygirlfriendiswritingablog.blogspot.com" - He's a very funny guy. Check it out! :)
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1 comment:
"Funny how? I mean, funny like I'm a clown? I amuse you? I make you laugh? I'm here to &%@* amuse you? How th' &%@* am I funny? What th' &%@* is so funny about me? Tell me. Tell me what's funny."
Heh heh...Joe Pesci in Goodfellas.
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